What does my husband really want for Father’s Day this year? That’s the question I’m asking myself, and I encourage you to ask yourself the same question. Maybe he wants one of the gifts advertisers have been promoting for weeks. And maybe he wants to celebrate by going out to dinner or getting together with extended family or doing some other traditional Father’s Day activity.
But maybe he doesn’t. I know for certain that my husband doesn’t want a new tie or any of the clothing advertised in the dozens of Father’s Day ads we’ve received. And I know for a fact that he doesn’t want to go to a crowded restaurant and wait in line for an hour! What about your husband? Do your Father’s Day plans include “expected” gifts and activities, or do they include the gifts he really wants to receive and the things he really wants to do?
Here are a few ideas for making Father’s Day plans in a way that will mean the most to your husband. (And, if your husband isn’t a father or isn’t yet a father, think about blessing him on Father’s Day anyway.)
- Plan the day around his interests and preferences. Maybe he wants to spend Father’s Day relaxing with you and the kids. Maybe he’s a sociable guy who would love to get together with extended family or friends. Maybe he would love for you to cook him a special meal. Or, maybe he really needs a day to himself, to enjoy one of his hobbies or just putter around. Think about what he would enjoy most (and ask him if you’re not sure) and do your best to make it happen.
- Give him a gift he will love to receive. Your husband may want a gift you can buy at a store, but he may not. (My husband says he wants a new weed eater!) He may want a gift that doesn’t cost any money or a gift of time or attention. He may want the gift of a short break from some of his responsibilities. Or the ever-popular gift of sex and intimacy with you! Don’t feel obligated to buy gifts he may not want, just because our culture says we need to celebrate Father’s Day by buying things. Think about what he really wants and try to make sure he receives it.
- Adapt your plans. In order to celebrate in a way that will bless your husband, you may need to be creative. If you know that the celebration on Sunday won’t be exactly what he wants or needs, plan an auxiliary celebration. For example, maybe he wants a day of peace and quiet and time to relax, but the kids are excited and have planned fun activities for him. Or your mother-in-law has invited the extended family for dinner. Maybe you’re finding that life is getting in the way. That’s what’s happening in my family. My husband and I have been sick this week, our jobs have been stressful, and I need to spend Thursday thru Saturday visiting my mother, who is recovery from surgery. In other words, the odds of us having a fabulous celebration on Sunday are pretty slim! So, I need to make sure we extend Father’s Day into next week, and plan something I know my husband will enjoy.
What are your plans for Father’s Day, and how are you tailoring them to meet your husband’s interests and needs? Please share your thoughts in the Comments – I would love to hear from you. Gaye
Sharing with Messy Marriage, We Are That Family, The Chicken Chick, Creative Geekery, Katherine’s Corner, Prowess and Pearls, Happy and Blessed Home, Powerful Mothering – Pin It Tuesday and To Love, Honor and Vacuum.
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