We all want to live in a cycle of love and joy – loving and being loved, knowing and being known, giving and receiving joy. But every marriage goes through times when that cycle is nowhere to be found. Times when both spouses are tense, frustrated, maybe even angry.
In those difficult cycles we tend to focus inward – nursing our grudges, cataloging our frustrations, trying to ensure that our needs are met. The problem with an inward focus, though, is that it usually prolongs the pain. The more we focus on ourselves and our own wants and needs, the unhappier we (and our husbands) become.
So when you find yourself in one of those cycles, try focusing outward instead, seeking primarily to meet his needs. Speak his love language. Go where he is, especially if he’s in a difficult place. Apply the Golden Rule to your marriage and treat your husband the way you want to be treated. Over time, you’re likely to find that you’ve replaced a cycle of pain with a cycle of love and joy.
Sharing with From the Farm Blog Hop, Family Fun Friday, Let’s Get Real Party, Friday Pin Fest and Turn It Up Tuesday.
Photo credit – (1) kesipun – Fotolia.com and (2) Magdalena Kucova – Fotolia.com
Monica Pruett says
Featuring at Family Fun Friday and Pinned!
Monica
http://www.happyandblessedhome.com/2014/02/family-fun-friday-week-56.html
GC says
Thank you, Monica! I am thrilled to be featured!
Gaye
jugglingrealfoodandreallife says
Isn’t it strange how easy over time it is to just take those we love for granted? What a wonderful world we would live in if we always treated our spouse like we were in “pursuit mode”. It’s nice to be comfortable with someone, but taking them for granted is something else. Thank you for this beautiful reminder. Hmm……….what can I do nice for my husband today? He sure is worth the extra effort!
GC says
Thanks Christina. Yes, if we could be in “pursuit mode” even 1/4 of the time, it would greatly benefit our marriages!
Gaye
Bonny at Oysterbed7 says
A big turning point for us was learning that we each had a love language and they weren’t the same. Finding out what he valued and pouring into Him turned the tide! And it turned pretty quickly. Thanks for your simple and easy call to action. It can make a big difference!
GC says
Hi Bonny – Yes, once you hear about the love languages it’s like, duh, how did I not see that before!
Gaye
Liz says
Oh, so true…thank you for sharing, I need to be reminded often to think of his needs above my own:-)
Liz
GC says
Thank you, Liz.
Gaye
Lindsay @brokeandbougie says
Just found you on the Turn it Up Linkup- really like your blog! such important reminders!
GC says
Thanks so much! By the way, your Greek Stuffed Chicken looks great! I just pinned it and am definitely going to try it.
Gaye
Gena says
Great reminders!
GC says
Thanks so much, Gena!
Gaye